Zoom-in Online

Let me preface this review by saying that it's not written with Indiana Jones fanboys in mind. The die-hards, like fellow Zoom In blogger Todd Howard, are so ingrained in the Indiana Jones mythos that no review, positive or negative, would effect their decision to see the film in the slightest way. Whether lauded as a sure bet for the Oscars or panned as a sloppy canonical imitator, those fans' nostalgia will override any structural flaws in the film to find satisfaction. This review is written for the casual fan, the ones who weren't raised on Dr. Jones's adventures, those on the fence, or for the ones who (though hard to imagine) have not seen any entry into the original trilogy. Similar to the last two Matrix films or George Lucas's Star Wars prequels, Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull futilely attempts to recapture the magic of its source material.

Crystal Skull kicks off the action right away. Already captives of Russian soldiers led by Irina Spalko (Cate Blanchett), Indy (Harrison Ford) and his protégé 'Mac' George McHale (Ray Winstone) are brought to the iconic military warehouse seen at the end of Raiders of the Lost Ark and forced to locate an artifact recovered from Roswell, New Mexico a decade ago. Can you guess what it is? Soon enough, Mac has turned on Indy and the ageless archeologist is running, swinging, and driving away from Communist bullets. He winds up in the hands of the FBI who, in the grip of McCarthyism, are suspicious of Jones for aiding the Russians, albeit unwillingly. After his office at the university is ransacked by the feds, Jones takes an unwilling leave of absence. His departure is interrupted by the arrival of the young Mutt Williams (Shia LaBeouf) who claims that Russians have kidnapped his mother - revealed later to be Marion Ravenwood (Karen Allen), and Indy is the only one who can help. As it turns out, Mutt and Indy share a mutual friend in Professor Oxley (John Hurt) who has apparently been driven mad on his quest to uncover the mystery behind the Crystal Skull of Akator. With lives on the line and Indy holding the only knowledge of Oxley's research, the two set out to find the skull and keep it out of the wrong hands.

Times have changed for both Harrison Ford and Indiana Jones and fortunately, the film doesn't attempt to pretend otherwise. Indy is old and he realizes it - at the outset of the film, he and Mac banter about how their escape would've been easier years ago. Yet to his credit, Ford never seems incapable of meeting the physically demanding tasks that Indy must face. Familiar faces are gone - Indy's dad and Marcus Brody having passed away - while the country's face is changing. Indy's colleague Charles Stanforth (Jim Broadbent) - in a clever shot at our current culture of fear - comments that he doesn't recognize the country anymore and that McCarthy has got people seeing Communists everywhere. Unfortunately, the new faces are far less interesting than the ones they replaced; a problem made worse as they trudge through a quest far less engaging than before, to solve a conflict with far lower stakes than before.

Steven Spielberg, to his credit, can still shoot one hell of a car chase and he flexes those muscles quite a few times in the film; the apex being a sword fight that takes place across speeding jeeps in the middle of a jungle. In between action sequences though, the film meanders through poorly written scenes of forced exposition spoken by uninteresting characters that lack emotional connections with the audience and each other. While the original Indiana Jones movies featured breath-taking action sequences injected with Indy's rapier wit, those scenes still played second fiddle to the characters and their relationships developing on screen. Similar to Iron Man, another hugely anticipated summer release, Crystal Skull seems to pander to the figure of Dr. Henry "Indiana" Jones instead of creating a good story in which Jones can take part. With Iron Man though, the CGI effects enhanced the film environment. With Crystal Skull, Spielberg and producer Frank Marshall vowed to return to old school Indy roots by using CGI only when necessary. Unfortunately for the audience, "only when necessary" translates to a gaudy 30% of the VFX and quite often they're distracting by how slick and fake they look.

Spielberg shouldn't have to shoulder much of the blame for the film's problems though. Legendary director Akira Kurosawa said that "with a bad script, even a good director can't possibly make a good film" and many of Crystal Skull's problems stem from David Koepp's script that ignores personal relationships and relies on too many scenes of ridiculously over-the-top action. In one sequence, Indy survives a nuclear blast on an atomic bomb testing site by hiding inside a lead-lined refrigerator. Perhaps executive producer George Lucas, who himself admitted Crystal Skull might disappoint, should take some responsibility for rejecting scripts from the likes of Frank Darabont. Suspension of disbelief is expected for an Indiana Jones film, but Crystal Skull asks for too much. Ironically, amidst all the action, there isn't one sequence worth canonizing. There's no giant boulder, no cavern of snakes, no sword fight cut short by a gun shot, no action sequence that can live up to the iconic status of past Indiana Jones stunts. Lucas has admitted he has ideas for a fifth Indiana Jones, but it seems that everyone has been detached from the story for so long that it's not possible to recapture lightning in a bottle. Perhaps they should considering hanging up the whip for good.